* Will Donna buy my story that international terrorists broke into the house and stole her Kindle, but that one of them accidentally left his behind, which is why I now have one and she doesn't?
* If I don't feed the fish before hitting the road this weekend, am I committing fish genocide, or performing an experiment in the Darwinian practices of fishkind? If none of them die, does that prove (or at least support the case for) the existence of God? If so, can I blame God (and exonerate myself) if some of them do die?
* Is the Easter Bunny more like (a) a giant form of the cuddly bunnies kids get their pictures taken with, (b) the harried (and drug-addled, if Grace Slick is to be believed) White Rabbit in Alice and Wonderland, or (c) the dead-eyed psychobunny in Donnie Darko (pictured)? My heart says (a). My head says (b) makes more sense, since that rabbit showed the manual dexterity to operate a pocket watch, which would come in handy for hiding eggs. (c) would be way more fun though.
* I saw a guy with a perfect square cut into his hair. It was about 2" x 2". I have no idea what happened. Logic says a haircut accident, but it's too perfect. I think he's a cyborg.
* A University of Minnesota "Iran expert" says charging a former Fargo journalist with espionage is "likely a political ploy" by the Iranian government. Gee, ya think?
* Marketing products in other countries is always a delicate proposition, what with the translating and all. I have to wonder though, did Kim Jong Il know what he was doing when he announced to the world that his country was launching a new rocket, dubbed the Dong 2?