Rights I Just Made Up: The Right To Closed Captioning At Football Games

An Ohio State football fan has had enough of going to games and not being able to hear everything. So he's suing the school in order to force them to provide closed-captioning on the scoreboard for everything from "referee calls to song lyrics".

I've been to games and couldn't hear the referee calls or anything the announcer said. Admittedly, these games were at the Metrodome, the single greatest abomination in the history of football, baseball, architecture, hot dogs, and parking. That aside though, I never thought, "you know, I paid for a ticket and I have a right to hear every word the announcer says. I have a right to hear the result of a flag from the referee's mouth, rather than having to figure it out by the placement of the ball and the replay showing the infraction".

I'd feel more sympathy for the guy if it wasn't for the following:

• He's been going to Ohio State games since he was a kid, and they were "some of his earliest and happiest memories". Somehow he was able to enjoy them despite the lack of closed captioning. (Yes, he was deaf as a child.)



• His first move wasn't to talk to the school. He went right to lawsuit. Do not pass "ask nicely", do not collect geniality points.



• Like all lawsuits, "it's not about the money". That's why he's not asking for comensatory damages. Oh wait, yes he is. What's the proper compensation for providing someone's "earliest and happiest memories"?

H/T to Overlawyered.