Who Wants Hashbrowns? (with Guestblogger BlandMan124789)

Hey, thanks to Jay for letting me guest blog today. He's real busy with the "making software" and the "cursing SharePoint", so he asked me to do a post. At first, I didn't know what to post about, but then it hit me: hashbrowns! Everybody loves 'em. Everybody eats 'em. And everybody wants to know how I make 'em (at least, they will once they see how I do it!).

The secret to good hash browns (any good dish, really) is salt. Or, more specifically, a glaring lack thereof. Nothing ruins potatoes more than having a sufficient amount of salt. Have you ever put a forkful of hashbrowns in your mouth and though, "whoa. Enough with the salt already, mister 'chef' guy. If I wanted all that flavor I'd ask for it". Happens to me all the time. It's the reason behind my boycott of Denny's. Well, that and the time my hamsteak was blue.

So, light salt (preferably none). What else? One word: consistency. Hash browns are supposed to be a close (you might say kissin' if you were a perv) cousin of mashed potatoes. And I'm not talking about skin-on homemade mashed potatoes with all the lumps. I'm talkin' about Hungry Jack when you don't have enough flakes in the box for all the liquid you heated up. I'm talkin' grits. When you see someone spoon hashbrowns onto a plate and they stick together in a single flat, stiff latticework of shredded starch, you know you're getting them from an idiot.

Hashbrowns should be eaten with a spoon.

-- BlandMan124789