Proof That Every Single Person On Australia's Classification Board Is A Man

Quick quiz: Which of the following is a requirement to appear in adult films or publications in Australia?

A. You must be certified disease-free by a board-certified doctor.
B. You must be eighteen years of age or older.
C. You must be registered with the Australian Adult Actors Guild.
D. You must have big boobies.

I assume A. and B. are true, but who knows? Well the internet does, I'm sure. Why don't you go ask if you want to know so badly. Sheesh. Same with C. The only one I'm absolutely sure is true is D.

The [Australian Classification] Board has also started to ban depictions of small-breasted women in adult publications and films. This is in response to a campaign led by Kids Free 2 B Kids and promoted by Barnaby Joyce and Guy

It turns out that ladies with small boobs are pedophile magnets in Australia. Apparently, they (the pedophiles) don't care so much how old the funtime gal is or what she looks like as long as she doens't need a bra.

While I get that this Board really wants to put the kibosh on kiddie porn, it seems like the laws in Australia would already cover this. This particular ban doesn't confine itself to eighteen- and nineteen-year-olds who can pass for much younger. The ban is also affecting established stars in their late twenties who haven't made enough going down under (look it up) to have bean bags stuffed into their chests (or just like themselves for who they are. Those crazy Australians porn stars with their well-adjusted self images. Crazy!)

So in short...